Dating spill

“Its never an easy thing to come clean with.” Not every relationship hides a secret like this one, but plenty of people face similar decisions about how much they should tell a new companion.Some confidential information can't stay that way forever—if you take daily medication or if you have a condition with visible symptoms, for example.

“Its something that will affect me if and when I settle down and have children, since I would not be able to take these medicines [while pregnant],” she explains.

“Its good to have somebody as a sounding board in a situation like this,” he says.

“How you handle this is not something your partner is likely to forget.” Laurie Davis, an online dating expert based in New York and Boston, suggests asking a friend what sounds most intimidating about your condition and getting his or her advice on how to smooth it over.

Never tell on a first date“Never tell someone on a first date,” Davis says. Robbins seconds that, especially if youre worried that your health secret “is likely to define you before the person has gotten a chance to know you at all.” That doesnt mean you should lie—just let your partner get to know you first.

“[Revealing too much too soon] may color how your partner sees you,” Dr. “It defines you before youre ready to be defined.” Jenny*, a 25-year-old graduate student from New York, had a breast augmentation when she was 19.

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