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Everyone was relieved, but at the same time, we had all changed: we were now aware that something like this could happen.” (Pg. I almost laughed aloud when I turned my head down to wipe my tears on my shirt and saw the pen I was pouring my pain through. 454)“One of the most frustrating things about the film work was that the producers never wanted to put me on box covers. My boobs were certainly big enough for all the men who stared at them every time I left the house. Just like at the Crazy Horse (strip club), the girls with the monster silicone got all the attention.” (Pg. And these girls, some of whom have the potential to become major stars in the industry, go home afterward and pledge never to do it again because it was such a terrible experience.” (Pg.377)“Joy had booked interviews and photo ops for me every ten minutes. I was willing to do anything to be someone who everyone loved. 160)“I had done so many photo sessions in the past year that I was literally being shot out of the business. 132)“In a worst-case scenario, a gonzo director will take a girl to a hotel room and have their friends shoot a cheap scene in which she is humiliated in every orifice possible.

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But the real reason was because he wanted to make sure I wasn’t sleeping with other guys – which, technically, I wasn’t.” (Pg. Note: Jenna was sleeping with a stripper named Melissa at the time.)“And slowly they (the pictures) began to appear: on the cover of Hustler; and then Cherry, and then High Society. It was Shauna Ryan, a Penthouse Pet and clearly the alpha female of the tribe. 134)“I began to feel like Suze (Randall) was taking advantage of me.

When I see those photos now, it seems obvious that the sexy pout I thought I was giving the camera was just a poorly disguised grimace of pain.” (Pg. Joy set up something after the awards show, and Goldstein came by to introduce himself. (Jordan.) He was so different than any guy I had met before.

94)“ To keep all of my body in focus and in the light, I had to bend and contort into all sorts of unnatural positions that were supposed to look effortless… He’s an obese, greasy, slovenly man, and was very touchy-feely with both of us. And that’s probably because I’d been in a world of strip-club owners, porn directors, and suitcase pimps for most of my adult life.

When you’re having sex, you’re at your most vulnerable.

Only a handful of women look good fucking: everyone has a little cheese here and there.

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